Hello my little one.
Mommy is so glad to have you home but at the same time I have been a bit anxious. I find myself very concerned about your wellbeing:
are you warm enough in this wintery period, concerned about how much milk and sleep you are getting. I seem to cry when you cry. It just feels like there is so much I could be doing wrong. I even want you back in my womb where I feel you could be more protected.

I wonder how your Daddy and siblings feel, probably don’t know what to do with me.
I keep praying, asking for comfort and peace, wisdom and guidance.
Also remind myself that my emotions affect you too and the milk.
Thank you, Lord for this family, all so loving and doing their best to comfort us and make us feel better.

Resource I enjoyed:
https://www.whattoexpect.com/first-year/month-by-month/week-1.aspx

Writing this now, I remember the overwhelming feelings and concerns. Easy for everyone around us to advise and try support. A new, just become, mommy needs all that, but sometimes that even feels overwhelming or sometimes makes you feel like you are not enough.
Let’s look at God’s word:
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” – Jeremiah 29:11
And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose. – Romans 8:28
I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you with my eye upon you. – Psalm 32:8 
Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight. – Proverbs 3:5-6
But, as it is written, “What no eye has seen, nor ear heard, nor the heart of man imagined, what God has prepared for those who love him.” – 1 Corinthians 2:9 

The Bottom line is, YOU ARE ENOUGH! This baby is part of God’s plan and purpose for you. We may feel like we fail, but the Lord is there, outstretched hand to pick you up and dust you off and show you how, where, what needs to be done.

Bible verse at the bottom of my book:
2 Thessalonians 3:16 May the Lord of peace Himself give you His peace at all times and in every situation.
(What a verse for this diary entry! Blows my mind how the Lord talks to us in so many different ways.)